You're getting key advice there. Major tool for you is the phrase "I'm sorry you feel that way". It doesn't say you agree or disagree. It shows a trace of empathy for their feelings. But it does not tie you to agreeing to anything concrete.
Some MLCers will run out of D gas. Some will go fast track. You can not change his momentum. You can refuse to assist in it. Let him do his own paperwork while you do yours. Be thorough. Blame everything on the L. That is part of what you are paying for. You can't help it if your L says "do this, don't discuss that ..." and remember "I'm sorry if you feel that way".
He is probably getting a lot of pressure from someone to do this quick. You can't change that either. By showing resistance to the process you anger him/them. By resisting, you must be crushed and eliminated. Show nothing. No emotion at all in front of him.
Others in the past also suggest validating his wishes in theory so he does not feel you are fighting him. So if he says this M is over you might try to say "I understand what you are saying and I agree the M was broken." That does not say it can't be worked on or that you want a D. You avoid conflict if possible, and let him think you acknowledge his concern. Yeah, right!
Understand that the D process takes time, but not as long as a MLC. The D very well may happen before he comes to his senses. Do not measure your life by his actions or by this outcome. You are not the whole blame for what he is going through or doing. This is his D. Make him do his own work. But you must be ready to fight for all that you deserve as the MLCer will not be the one to take care of you.
The MLCer lives in "All About Me" world. Everyone is out to get them, they trust no one. No amount of good or fairness you attempt will be judged that way. You will be against him in his eyes no matter what you do, unless you totally cave in to his crazyness and that will only end up ruining your life. Don't!
The one that wants out should leave. If H says he needs time and space, you should consider offering to help him pack and move. Living under the same roof with MLC is 24x7 nightmare. By trying to get him to stay home you are not avoiding the mlc. You are only forcing it on yourself and your son. Let your H waste money on an apt and start getting the idea of what D will cost for years to come... if he insists. If you want the house and can swing it financially, fight for your family home. Protect any assets you can, he won't do this for you. Focus on you and son.
