Hi - I just caught up on the last few posts. My h started to get worried about impotence [quite unecessarily from an objective point of view. He then decided that because he had VERY occasional dysfunction - attributable to being tired or having a little too much to drink] he wasn't sexually compatible with me.
And of course oral sex makes this much less of a problem . .
He made it sound like something that happened ever time we made love rather than once or twice a year [in an active sex life] I tried to tell him that this was actually extremely common, but he just looked at me as if he was the only man on earth that EVER had these problems.
Regarding men who WANT to continue with ML/intimacy/sex during MLC and/or during affair with OP. I really think it is entirely down to individuals, and how they feel they are interacting.
It isn't an issue for me, but I can imagine circumstances where I would, and where I wouldn't. I don't think it can be easy where there is another person in teh relationship, but I can also see that if maintains a connnection it would be valuable. Also we are the ones with a 'right' to the relationship.
I know that many advise not have a sexual relationshp with a partner who is having an affair, but I believe that in MLC all bets are off!!
Virtually all of the people who post here are people of immense integrity, and we are struggling with a situation where there are no maps and compasses to guide us.
That is one of the many things that makes the forum so valuable for me - the persepctive and experiences of others . . .
