I was continuing to have sex/ML w/H up until recently when even though I felt "connected" and for 99% of the time I did not feel used...I felt I could not go on like this forever, which is how I feel his stated of confusion will take especeilly if I make it seem OK to sleeep w/ two women.
I guess the reason why I didnt feel "used" was b/c H is the type (sort of reversed roles here) like a woman...
I always wanted to have "make up" sex after we faught. H would hold on to his anger until the next day and refused to be touched by me. H is the type that if you make him angry or sad he simply doesnt have the mood it takes to ML.
Looking back at these past few months that H has wanted more and more sex w/ me its (IMO) b/c he has been fighting and having the REALITY day to day prombelms w/ OW. I feel inside me that their sex life was prolly close to none exciting at one point when were doing it all the time. I happen to put two & two together the other day of why? has he been wanting this so much? And it wasnt until D10 told me of how him & OW fight all the time and H even called Ow the B word!!
Now I have stoped all sexual encounters..I think simply b/c I feel like I really dont NEED it? H was sad I asked him to stop teasing me or pursuing me. You see all duting this He has been the one to iniate all the time. Some of the times when he didnt I woudl just give him "the look" and of we went.
I thought I was the one in our R w/ the highest sex drive b/c it seemed like I was the one doing all teh iniating, but H told me that was not the case..it was my "attitude" that would get in the way of him wanting to do anything... We use to argue alot, I would react to his every mood, but all that has changed. I have done alot of growing... So in ways I am thankful for this wake up call for me.
