Please consider doing this one healing thing as you continue your new next life. When you reflect or share a brief history with others, rethink your comment that you failed, but are not a failure.
If someone sets out to move a mountain alone and most of us consider that task impossible, do they fail to move the mountain? Was it ever a possibility? Or, did they try beyond all hope to do the impossible because it was indeed worth trying?
You were very limited in what you were ever going to be able to do. You tried to save your M, your family, and your kids. You placed yourself behind those priorities. You saved what you could. Do you want to guess how many people are not even able to do that in the face of this nonsense? You succeeded in all that you had the ability to accomplish.
Your fw checked out on many levels. It doesn't matter if she had control over those things or not, she became the mountain.
