things are different now, mk, they feel different. then, it felt like there was a chance. now, honestly and truly it feels like he is moving on. he's done. thinking on it, he actually looked like he had a weight lifted off of his shoulders while he was here today.
he's going thru with it, all I can do is try to get the best deal I can. am going to e-mail him the names of the two mediators tomorrow. then the ball is in his court. it sucks, but looks like he is getting his way. but I'll be okay...just need to carve out a new way for myself.
and yeah, you are right, I met lots of great guys, as friends, at the db meet. no, nothing sexual about that night. nothing sexual in my life, other than frustration and an occasional lack of judgement when it comes to H.
what a difference from last weekend. seriously. I was all ready to ask how he is, to see if I could crack that window. we had unexpected sex. I felt that window seriously crack just a little and thought things might even get better. when wham, he slammed it shut and made sure the rest of the house was shut up tight. if anything, it feels like he spent the week digging a moat.
I'm very curious as to the trigger. wonder if he even knows it himself.
ahh, well, so it goes. another thing he said last night is that what he did was wrong (the affair) but its not a bad thing to divorce, tons of people do it after all.
and no, I didn't say, if they all jumped off a bridge, would you? pre-crucial conversations, I probably would have snarked exactly that.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
