Jeanette - Yes, he has said to everyone that he knows what the OW is like! He told me months ago that the affair was coming to its inevitable conclusion - except that he hadn't thought beyond that, and she doesn't want to let him go.

Yes, he has madona/whore problems and he knows she is a 'whore'.

I told him that I couldn't be his friend because friends treat each other with empathy and compssion.

As for teh 'cry for help/ I don't know if you read Valeria's recent thread, about her h saying 'Why didn't you stop me' A close friend of mine who knows my h very well,said to me that he feels that a bit of my h wants me to march over there, smack the OW in the face and march h home.


All sorts of repressed feelings are bubbling around, and because he has never dealt with his feelings he is like a ship without a compass or rudder, or whateever ships use. And I am not helping him, deliberately. Not because I am am an evil bitch [well I can be!! ] but because I realise that he has to deal with this in order to finally grow up completely.

A friend of mine whose h had a minor MLC said to her 'The age of innocence is over' I feel that is true, and that I have perhaps finally grown up.
But I decided to take the highroad,