Well, S still has slight fever. Went in the morning and spent time with the kids. Retro called to confirm. I've told the W previous what they would ask. Well, even so it didn't go well. She said yes to them. But she started feeling all down. Saying that she felt like she's lying to them. She isn't going there to work on our M and etc etc. She's thinking of backing out. She said that just the weekend it's a lot of money and that she does not want to do the followups. She is very adamant that she will not change her mind there about us. I told her that we are there to work on our relationship and communication. It would be for the kids if not for us. And that is priceless and money shouldn't be a concern. I also said that I'm really not expecting any miracles. I can't afford to get my hopes up anymore. I can't survive another let down like that. So don't expect me thinking that we go to Retro and some miracle happens and she will want this M again.
Any which way, she said she is full of anger and resentment towards me because she felt the mess that I've put us in. She says she feels that way went I'm around too much. Personally I think it's more her guilt of the Retro phone call rather than anything else. Anyways, so I was asked to leave. Oh well.... I guess it's the ups and downs. I think I just starting to really realize how much resentment/anger she has towards me..... I really hope Retro will help her let go some of that. It's very difficult for us to even move our friendship forward when she is not letting that go.
At least we are still going to the state fair tomorrow....
M: 31 W: 31 M: 7 T: 8 S:4 D:2 Bomb dropped: too many to count or remember, 12/17/07 last one S on 9/2/07 W sent off D papers 12/31/07. Me trying to live life and hope she returns one day.
