P.S. maybe you were looking for a 2x4 about snooping, not going to get it here. Only a 2x4 about being more honest with yourself about H.
BUT if you are in a place emotionally/financially where you can both accept the pretty high stakes here and just wait to see how things play out without putting yourself at risk of feeling like a victim (which I think you are), then you can really afford to be very generous to H in terms of giving him the benefit of the doubt. And in general that is a good thing for an M, to be as generous with each other as possible. So, good for you :-)
