I've been reading from this forum for awhile There are some great solutions and now I'm really undecided. The short of it is ...my H had an affair and admited it when I confronted him. He has used all the classic lines and excuses(which blew me away when I saw it's exactly what all MLC's say!) After many ups and downs I forgave him and wanted to move forward. I go for C he will not! This has all happened in the last 4 months. He went to his lawyer.(because I was tired of him saying he was leaving and then not go anywhere. I told him to go and get some details from his lawyer)Wow, she must have given him the details because when he came home the 2 X 4 mark was written across his face! Basically I'm in the drivers seat! I had to find out from someone else because he could't even explain it to me he was so angry! That night when I asked him to "please answer me just one question" I know I shouldn't have but I did "why, why the affair after 25 years" He told me I was a f88ken looser and I don't love you anymore... among other nasty things ....welllllll That was the last straw for me I have never asked him before and actually haven't brought anything up for more than a month and acted "as if" everything was working out fine. I went to get some free lawyer advice and I'm ready for the seperation. He's going to flip because I want everything liquidated and I want out. Problem...because I have changed and I'm sure he sees this (plus the fact I'm sure, what his lawyer told him,) he is now talking to me and I'm wondering if I should move forward. The more he pulls these stupid stunts(Swearing at me and angry at me..he had the affair not me!)I want out. I'm not a loser and I want better for myself.
Should I give him another chance? Should I tell him where I'm at with all this? Should I keep moving forward? Is he doing this because of what his lawyer said? Should I keep doing what I'm doing and see if his actions are stronger than his words? I'm starting to put up a all between him and ik because I don't want to be hurt anymore. But I do still love him. I feel as though he is self destructing from the inside but is still in denial, although he did admit to it. Some input would be appreciated as I really do value from the men and woen on these forums.
"Sometimes in the winds of change, we find our true direction"
