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Jak,

Perhaps your husband isn't one of those touchy-feely emotional guys. Could it be he just doesn't feel comfortable with showing emotion or having attention showered on him? Maybe it's not you, but him?

I've come to realize this is how my husband is. For many years I used to think it was me. I used to think things like; my husband doesn't do this so he doesn't love me, etc... But what I eventually realized is this is his personality and part of who he is. My husband is not touchy-feely all the time, and will push me away... and it's not personal. This isn't about me. He'd be this way with anyone over time. Yes, in the beginning of a relationship he'd be different, but in time he'd be himself again.

What I've learned is I still hug him even if he'll kind of push me away sometimes with some excuse (your hands are cold!), and I'll call or compliment him knowing he might not do it back. Because that's who he is, and this is who I am. It's not personal. He still loves me, he just shows it differently.


There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
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Originally Posted By: jak58
Matilda,

Where are you?

i can't find your thread anywhere on these boards.

J


I'm here! Thaks for asking!!! I am following along and wish you luck finding a connection SOON! My thread locked a while ago and I'm waiting for something worthwhile to write about.
Thinking of you!!!!
Matilda

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Aw jak I'm sorry for the bad news!!!

Now I really want you to come join me for a road trip... unfortunately will probably be paying off my last one for a few months but what the heck.

((((jak))))

It's time for good news.


Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7
Bomb 1 10/07/06
Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15
Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07
Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate
2/08 slowly improving
7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!)
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Hope the week gets better after dealing with the funeral and H's hunting trip. Thinking of you!

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Mat,

Im'e thinking of you too.

H got home at 10:30 last nite Haven't seen much of him at all since Saturday.

Before he left he did tell me he loves me which I guess is a good thing but also confuses me. He says one thing and then does things that show me different.

Just crazy

How was your weekend?

J


You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when, you can only decide how you're going to live now. ~Joan Baez
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Originally Posted By: jak58
He says one thing and then does things that show me different.

Just crazy


Heh, my H has yours beat, I believe! We're in the middle of a D and he calls me sweetheart and honey! (OR maybe that is just safer than calling me the wrong name!

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MAT,

YOU CERTAINLY DO HAVE ME BEAT..

J


You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when, you can only decide how you're going to live now. ~Joan Baez
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Can't say that I'm proud of that accomplishment! Just hope it makes you feel a tiny bit less crazy, JAK!

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MAT,

What i think is that no one ever fully detaches. To a great extent yes but not fully. Not when you are trying to piece and not when your H or w lives in the same house. I guess that is why i let H's actions and words confuse me. I do know I will be Happy though either way. \:\)

J


You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when, you can only decide how you're going to live now. ~Joan Baez
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So what are your weekend plans? Is your H hunting again? I have a going away party for a co-worker tonight.

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