I have Indigo Girls tickets for Nov 2. when I bought them a couple of months ago I invited h to come with me. He is not interested in their music but said he wanted to go because he wanted to be with me. Undoubtedly he will still say that he wants to go with me.
The thing is. I don't think he'll enjoy the music. I was really looking forward to it as I haven't been to a live concert since...university days I think! I'd rather go on my own than go with someone who will not like the music but because I thought there was still hope for h and I, I invited him.
Now....I don't want him to come with me.
I guess the cowardly part of me has been poo poo-ing his comments when he says that I don't want to spend time with him. He is right....I don't - but I'm scared to tell him that. Why? Because he will withdraw from me and I will feel guilty. It will make it harder for me to get him to spend time with d6 and it will be harder to be amicable about things if he thinks I hate him. I don't hate HIM, I hate what he is doing and how he is behaving. I want to not be available to be hurt, to fuel his insecurities, I want to feel special, I want to not be walking on eggshells. There are still things I need him to do (get his stuff out of the house, spend more time with d6, etc).
Should I just suck it up and be friendly and go to the concert with him? He will need to have taken time off so I feel that I can't withdraw the invitation now. I'm too scared to 'stand him up'. I dont' even know if he will still expect to go. I don't know how to bring up the topic.
