Don't poison many of your conversations with GP with this topic. Your xH is now like the old friend you have to whom you don't lend money or make land deals with. Hopefully, there are a few fond memories and now just some tolerance. I'm sorry for the financial woes. Hold him to his part within the limits of the legal system but just don't fret too much because you know he won't/can't deliver.
Actually, GP had a similar but worse situation with the mother of his younger son so it's more like he's just giving me the advice he finally gave himself but with the advantage of being some years down the road from that relationship, like you and your X. Of course, your sich was/is actually worse because your kids were/are younger. The main downside for my kids is just that they might end up deprived of a bit of the extended financial adolescence that many of their peers will receive. IMO this has some benefits as well as costs so sort of a mixed blessing/curse. My son actually has a sort of manly job now which will probably give him some fallback job skills he can use in his future life so my maternal role has fallen to occasional inquiries about whether/when he might want to re-enroll in college and enrolling him as an official member of my Cookie of the Month Club. My daughter is almost certainly going to get a full-ride academic scholarship and my FIL is already giving her a monthly allowance/stipend. So really my financial problems are just short-term ones dealing with wrapping up the mess my 2bx left behind and unloading the "haunted" house in which my D and I are currently living like campers or good messy student dorm mates (she wears the same size as me in everything now so she steals all my clothes and yet I am not allowed to wear hers - lol)
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
