Plank removed from my eye, too late for WAW? 7

[Heimlich]

Yeah, had pretty much decided that as well. Discussed logistics/options on the way into the office with W. Will see what's possible on this end.

Thanks folks.

Don't know if it's a good or bad idea to talk to W. Probably will. Opening up to her on something like this would be a 180 for me. Plus, she knew her for 16 years.

[SunnySeason]

Good morning Heim,

I really enjoyed this from you on a different thread;

Makes perfect sense. Welcome to the land of pseudo-detachment

I've visitied a few times, hoping to take up permanent residence soon. If you backslide and find yourself really caring about your H, don't sweat it. It happens. We all get there at different points and stages.

I might be "opening up" challenged, as it's related to the WAS anyway, and that may be why it looks dangerous to me for you to do so with your W. Not a good idea, IMHO.
If she comes to you, different story.

Don't know if it's a good or bad idea to talk to W. Probably will. Opening up to her on something like this would be a 180 for me.

L&L,

Sunny

[Heimlich]

Wow, this email alert thing is dangerous for productivity.

She offered to listen if I wanted to talk twice, without prompting/fishing from me. Actually hadn't occurred to me that I could talk to her about how I was feeling until she said something -- email first, verbally second. Actually, I'm surprised at how this has made me feel. I've been expecting that phone call from my dad for a few years now.

Your home OK, Sunny?

BD

[Not Much Left]

H
So she is coming to you now? Dont get sucked back into her mess, you seem to be doing really well. Just my spidy sense.

[chicki]

H,

Isnt that par for their course? Just as we get to that "pseudo detachment".....along they appear from nowhere!!!

ditto,cva dont get sucked back in.......

get your mojo back again.....love life w/out her!!!

As i am doing....made it w/out him before all of this and can make it once more...

[SunnySeason]

Hi Heim,

My home is fine, thanks for asking. There's ash covering everything outside, & a thin layer inside on the surfaces, nothing to fret about compared to the people really impacted.

As I said, I might be somewhat extreme on opening up to the WAS, especially if they're looking for more space. You know what the best way to go is though.

Sunny

[Heimlich]

But, remember guys, I want to get sucked back in

It's a kindness on her part, nothing else. My comment about my feelings had to do with my Mawmaw, not my W's offer to listen if I need to talk.

After inviting me to eat with her and the girls the night of Casey's bday, she's been kindof distant, which I had expected. Could be a baby step back. Dunno.

Only one way to find out.

BD

[Not Much Left]

Oh, Chicki
Apart from the physical closeness to someone else, just realize you are very vulnerable right now and likley to get sucked into something w/ someone else. Unlike us guys who get "thrown out" and will not be home with the kids should a D take place, if I was the primary care giver, pretty sure I would avoid any R at all for a long time. Again, apart from the physical part which is tough to let go of, I think it is the right tactic. But I am a guy so....

Sorry H, just on a roll

[chicki]

CVA,

I agree totally, I guess I am coming from what Nomo says.....just enjoying meeting new faces..

Sorry to hijack H!

OK here it goes, I had a very secluded childhood up even until 22yrs old when I was stil living w/ mom while I went to college. My strict religious mom had a curfew for me at 22yrs old!!! I couldnt take it anymore and moved out on my own & btw 22 to 27yrs....I finally lost my virginity, (yeah late), but I truly wanted to save myself for M & met H.

I only really had a true single life full of dating for 4 years.

Now I say, its my turn...and I will live life to the fullest w/ my three daughters..

[Heimlich]

Funny about the physical part, while I enjoy sex more than the average bear, that's not really what I miss the most. I've realized over the last few months that I miss HER and that, in some ways, I hadn't really been appreciating her for a while.

Anyway, as a non-high powered venture capitalist and someone who actually believes the evidence of climate change (read, don't skim, some of that stuff, CVA, it's terrifying), at least I get to spend equal time with my kids and don't feel like I was "kicked out" of anything other than a R I very much wanted (and want) to be in.

Don't know if this will get put to the test in the short term, but I don't know if I'd be vulnerable or not to a new R. Can't say if the walls would go up or down, you know?

BD