Husband, you are correct, and I know this.. maybe it's the self pity, but it's hard to be in a good mood. It eats at me constantly, and by pretending to be in a good mood it feels like we are just letting it be water under the bridge. I need some closure on some of it before just letting it slip away - does that make any sense? Can I still be in a good mood, happy, and expect I'll ever get the closure I need. Or do I just need to move on, and forget about getting this closure? I don't know that I can do that. The snooping will stop, working on weaning off :), but the mood is a whole separate beast. I don't just mope around feeling sorry for myself, but I do experience quite a range of emotion and it's hard to keep that level.
Thanks for the words of advice/encouragement - unfortunately for you, you all know better than I do at this point. I'm just trying to figure it all out.
