Wait until mediation on the logistics of the D unless you feel your H is willing to discuss things with you openly.
That's a tough call. I think he's open to talking, but I'd have to be really careful. I know we'd have to hammer it out in mediation, but I'm wondering about opening up about how I'm feeling about it, I guess.
Originally Posted By: Heimlich
Home school v work v freelance are all things you knew you'd have to consider anyway. I think you're more surprised that H brought it up and is pushing this forward. Nothing new or surprising here, I don't think.
Sigh, I think you're right. Once again I'm reminded that it's one thing to know it and another to hear it. I wonder how many more of these are waiting down the line?
Originally Posted By: Heimlich
Given the content of your conversation, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that he's definately interested in you. If he was interested in you while you were married . . .
...then he might still be interested? Is that where you're going? And yeah, reflecting on that conversation is what finally caused a light bulb to go off in my thick head.
Originally Posted By: Heimlich
Get your separation agreement in place first....Then, if you want to go for a beer/coffee with the guy, go ahead.
So you're saying it'd be a date, even if he's the only one who might be looking for something? (That was my friend's position: only one person has to be interested for it to be a date.)
Regardless, though H is clearly open to dating (and told me early on he'd know I'm okay when I start dating), you still think I need a legal doc in place before I have coffee with the guy?
Okay, let me throw yet another question out there. The place I met him was my old haunt, a place near and dear to my heart. H also met COW (my friend) there. It's a place where often people know too much about each other's business (especially since COW's psycho ex announced to everyone that COW and H were having an affair before H ever dropped the bomb, but then again he also said COW and *I* were having an affair).
I haven't been back since H dropped the bomb. I've assumed that everyone knows far more about my sitch than I'd care to share, and to be honest, my pride won't let me go.
Lately I've been thinking that for the sake of humility---Homer's "why not me?"---I might go back. I think I've overestimated who knows (or cares), and I feel like I've lost something---to my pride, and to H and COW---that was MINE.
And lastly, I could have a beer with this guy there without it being a date.
