You guys locked me up with your bickering over my friends! Here's to you.
First off, CVA, you're clearly a scanner. If you'd read the whole thing, you would've known Heim was talking about a friend of mine, while the A-type person you and I were talking about is my sister. No reason to argue!
I had a great weekend camping. It was a bit out of my comfort zone, since I know most of the campers but not nearly as well as they know each other. Had a few down hours but shook myself out of it, remembered some stuff from therapy, and really enjoyed myself.
We all went on a great 5-mile hike, which was fantastic. Hiking is something I've always wanted to do but have never gotten around to, never had anyone to go with, hardly have gone alone, etc. So that was really nice. Met some great people, had good conversations. Remembered I'm much more a one-on-one person than a group person, but also worked on the group small-talk thing.
Got back in cell phone range and H called, asked what my plans were. Said I'd be home in a couple hours, would spend the afternoon with the kids, then was going out in the evening.
H: Yeah, that doesn't work for me. me: Do you remember that I have concert tickets for tonight? H: No. me: We emailed back and forth about it. H: Well, sucks for me. Okay. Bye.
Got home and H and kids were out; showered, H and kids showed up followed by H's folks. H ignored me. Talked to the folks. MIL said, "If you guys split up, you should have a party and invite all your friends, show them there's no war going on." H went inside. Apparently not a popular idea with him.
H asked when I planned to leave, told him, he shook his head in disbelief and left.
When he returned, he told me the time's not working for him, he needs all the evenings this week. Can't phone for apartments with the kids around. I thought for a split second and said, "Okay."
Wish now I'd said, "That sounds rough. Let me think about it" or "That sounds rough. Would you like to get a sitter for one of your nights?"
Truth is he was so tightly wound and so clearly unhappy/angry/whatever that I was a bit intimidated and didn't want to start a fight. Talked to friend; friend says 1) I'm letting him walk on me, 2) This is setting a precedent, and 3) He (friend) thinks this is going to get ugly. Scary stuff.
Got two emails from H over the weekend in response to mine asking him to refrain from hanging out with the kids and COW until we talked to kid C. H said sorry, not going to do that. Then in the second message clarified that since COW doesn't fit into the category of someone he's dating or interested in, but is rather a very dear friend who's not going anywhere soon, that it's moot; said he's glad we agree on keeping the kids away from romantic entanglements. Added a snarky, "Lucky for you..." there's no way they could hang out until after the talk anyway.
So there you go: H claims no romantic interest in COW. I'll have to take his word for it. We'll see what C says.
On a muuuch cheerier note, returned from camping to a message from an old acquaintance. Months back, pre-bomb, I'd met a guy at a place I used to hang out a lot. He's beautiful, sweet, and fun to talk to. I'd thought of introducing him to a friend of mine, but he suddenly disappeared (thought he was moving back east).
After what turned out to be our last conversation, I realized, holy cow! He's interested in *me*, shocking to me in my very married state. Anyway, after he disappeared I asked this old acquaintance to call me if he showed up again (so I could see if he wanted to hang out with my friend). And this weekend, I got a call from the friend, telling me the guy's back around and has been asking about me, and gave me his cell number.
I'm not a big fate person, but I sure appreciate the timing of this info. I spent about four hours wondering whether or not I should call him, asking myself what I wanted, what I was looking for, etc.
And whatever you're going to say: too late! I called.
Got a message back saying how happy he was to hear from me, how sad he'd been to go back to the hangout after school was over, then again on break, then again at the end of summer and not find me there. Said he felt like we'd "left a cool conversation hanging" and he'd like to get back to it, likes talking to me, let's hang out.
By the way, the "cool conversation" was about whether or not it's okay to sleep with someone who's married, as he'd had a big come-on from a married woman (and had declined).
Talked to good friend about it last night, who asked whether I was still interested in setting this guy up with my friend. I said I wasn't sure, but it certainly wasn't among the top two reasons I'd like to see him, which include he's great to talk to and someone I'd like to be friends with, and I think he's cute and I think he thinks I'm cute, and that would be really nice, especially after living months with Mr. "I Don't Want to Be with You." Friend said it's good to be clear on your reasons, and go for it.
Friend also said I don't have to consider it a date for it to be a date.
