LuvMyHusband, The obsessing slowed down just over time. With me, I knew he was still with her and that the "proof" I was looking for just kept hurting me because it gave me more details that I really didn't want to know. I just felt worn down from the details. Whenever I felt anxious and wanted to try and track his every move, I would pick up one of my self-help books and read some and that would help me. Also what helped was I just accepted the fact that he was with her and there was nothing I could do to control that. There was nothing I could do to control it, so I let it go--I let it be.
It also sort of hit me to stop when a friend compared my obsessing to someone w/ bulemia. The binging and purging felt good momentarily for a bulemic, but the binging and purging had worse consequences than that momentary good feeling.
Definitely try getting out of the house, read something that is constructive and just try and let it be.
H & I, both 32, together since 18. *M 7/03, A since 9/06. Bomb 7/07, H ended it w/ OW 9/08 * Agreed to D 6/09...very hard *D 8/10 * At peace, have become great friends w/ X-H and his new GF
