Now I've done it.... again #4?

[mkultra]

Sorry So Long But You Asked Why You Were Being So Maochistic. It is because you are a human being.Understanding Masochism: Why We
Keep Banging Our Head Against A Wall…
In the 1950’s, I struggled to understand masochism. Psychoanalysts said pain becomes a
pleasure, but they didn’t explain how it becomes a pleasure. I asked some of them if pain
becomes a pleasure, why doesn’t all pain become a pleasure so we have no pain left over?
People who are depressed or are anxious are in pain. Why doesn’t that pain change into a
pleasure? Of course, there’s no explanation for it.
Psychologists said it’s a matter of not knowing a better way. That didn’t explain everything
to me. For example, I’m banging my head against a wall to produce a painting. Say I’ve got
a bare wall in my office and I need a painting. So I’m banging my head against the wall to
produce a painting.
Now, it never produces a painting, but I persist in banging my head against the wall.
Psychologists say, “Poor Homer! It’s because he doesn’t understand and doesn’t know about
paint brushes and paint sprays.” Well, that explains why I don’t use paintbrushes and paint
sprays, but it does not explain why I don’t stop banging my head against the wall. And it’s
quite observable, quite provable that people do bang their head against the wall and keep
doing it.
So why do I bang my head against the wall, even though it causes me to feel depressed and
cry, and I persist in doing it? Because simultaneously with my banging my head against the
wall, I’m patting myself on the head. So I’m giving myself ego satisfaction.
Another metaphor. I keep reaching my hand into a hot oven. My hand burns and I’m crying
about it, but I keep putting my hand in the hot oven because there is a bite of food there.
There’s a bite of pie. If there’s no pie at all, I don’t do it. There’s got to be a bite of pie. So I
have people see that there’s a whole lot more pie on top of the stove, and you don’t get
burned.
I was explaining to a psychologist who was in for marriage counseling in my office years ago,
I said, “I just finished with a client. He’s staying with his wife, who has open contempt for
him.” I said, “I’ve discovered that the less love that a man has received from his wife, the
more he’ll cling. And the more love that he’s received from her, the more he’s able to let go.”
I told this particular client, “Jeff, imagine that my office here is full of refrigerators. They’re
glass refrigerators, so you can look inside and see most of them have good food in it and the
doors swing open easily. But there’s a refrigerator over here open easily. But there’s a
refrigerator over here that has bad food in it and the door is stuck, and you’re fascinated with
that refrigerator. And you say that you’re clinging to that refrigerator because you’re hungry
for food. No way. You subconsciously want pain.”