More complicated than I imagined...

[Michael Mc C]

Well, W said she will not be going tonight and she seems pleased that I will be going without her. Not even going to try to figure out why she's pleased - what matters is that I'm pleased that I'm going.

On a more negative note, I just found out that she told my sister a few days ago that she's relieved that I have finally accepted the fact that she needs to get out of this marriage (I never told her that I accepted this but I guess it has been inferred some how). She told my sister that she has no interest in fixing the R and is really looking forward to being on her own.

Had a long talk with my sister last night about the situation. She's not sure why I am still allowing W to stay in the bedroom. I'm not sure I know why either.

I think part of me is still hopeful (must be, or I wouldn't be here!). Nothing physical has happened with her and OM (again, he's 400 miles away and they've never met) so it doesn't feel "wrong". I'm not sure that her moving out of the room would have any bearing on how she's feeling right now anyway.

I wonder, however, if I'm sending the wrong message. Maybe she's thinking I've accepted that our marriage is over and that's why I haven't asked her to move...

I don't want to have another R talk right now but maybe I need to explain to her that I haven't accepted that this is the end and because of our different feelings on the subject, sharing the bed is not a good idea.

Just don't want to undo any good I have already done through 180 and GAL'ing. Although based on the discussion she had with my sister, I don't know that ANY good has come of it yet.