The Zoo of the Surreal

[Kettricken]

Personally, when I'm feeling "starved", it's this stuff I *really* am missing ... the sizzle, not so much the steak, ironically.

If I had to choose between (a) sex once a week but with lots of fondling and cuddling and sexual tease and mutual admiration during the balance of the week or (b) sex four times a week with none of the aforementioned extras, I would hands down, no question choose (a).

This proved to be incredibly difficult to explain satisfactorily to S., at least as far as producing meaningful change went. He seemed to be functioning very much in "on or off" mode in which "On" = "chemically horny/ready to have sex" and "Off" = "not a sexual thought percolating around in his mind". Which naturally resulted in an arid wasteland as far as sexual tension between times went, which greatly contributed to my frustration and (I think) a tendency to "go straight for the sex act" -- more often than I even personally wanted, in retrospect -- because it was the only way I could explore the display, or I suppose I should say "interplay" of my *sexuality*.

I'm curious as to whether anyone else has had this experience with the ON/OFF approach in their partner's sexuality?

Like RJ and Lillie said, all this teasing anticipatory vibe works SO much better when you have emotionally gotten the memo that this IS going to last for awhile, meals will be regular and you no longer feel the need to attack like a starving bear at a pancake breakfast.......