What struck me straight off was the fact that she is trying to tell him how to prioritize the things in his life. That has to stop. If she feels neglected when he helps a friend in need, she is the one who has to figure out why she feels that way and how she can deal with it. I don't see how telling another person "you have to put me first or I can't be with you" is going to help anything. Life happens and sometimes other people need our spouse's help more than we do at that moment.
