ILY's & ML...no fights..this is a strange S! Help!

[Gingersnap]

Thanks for the support, Neph. Yes, I need to find a way to react to the anger differently. I tend to just shut down when he starts that and I know it's not working. Must be some sort of a defense mechanism for me.

Dom, yes, I take this latest convo as negative. I don't see a positive in him calling me to yell about life in general. I could do without that. And from what I've read about boundaries it's up to me to put a stop to it. No, right now we are not healthy as a couple. I can't be his enabler or punching bag. This has been a long year of rants, irritability and depressed behavior. So in my view stroking that part of him is enabling. I'm not sure what the right answer is.

H just called again to say he's off for a nap and will be around later. He's clueless that the earlier convo even bugged me...so I don't think he was affected one way or another. I can, at least, see that possibly being overworked and very tired has contributed to this latest bought of anger. I will say that it has seemed to be easing up a little since the S. With a conflict avoider it's difficult to tell if real progress is being made or if they are pretending things are better.

Ok Dom...lemme have it. I'm tired today and could use an encouraging word, though. Gotta tell ya.