Alone

[MaxP]

Dom,

Thanks for your input. Sometimes you need someone to say things that aren't necessarily easy to hear. One of my complaints has been that I don't understand why this has happened. I think that I need to think about this much more. I have some ideas though:

At the beginning of our R we both drove the relationship and I did things that my W had never done. We had fun. As our R developed I started to take more of a back seat and was content just to spend time with my W. That made me happy. However, I think she slowly came to feel that she was responsible for looking after me and grew to resent that. As she became more critcal I withdrew more - I don't argue (which is a problem) - to the extent that I no longer really know what I want. I stopped making decisions and organising things to do with and without her and she felt she lost her independence. From that point attraction then love can quickly fail. I can see why 'it no longer feels right' could be the her conclusion.

Does that sound plausible?

I worry that her declaring it's over is an impossible position to come back from. However, in some ways it wipes the slate clean. What I think I need to do is go back to DR and follow it carefully, not just read, do. Part of this process needs to be learning what drives me again and also discovering how to be assertive and not shy away from healthy arguments. I need to rediscover how to live an exciting life - and at the moment it feels like I haven't a clue how to start. But I do need to start. Hopefully I can call on the support of others here to help me.

Thanks,

Max