ILY's & ML...no fights..this is a strange S! Help!

[Gingersnap]

Well, since I've spoken to Mr. Hyde for the past week it's only natural that I'd hear from Dr. Jekyll soon.

H called again last night. Sweet/soft Mr Hyde voice. I was a little annoyed because I'm just not feeling it right now and it was 11:15pm. So I kept it brief and said goodnight.

H calls again this morning. But his voice is higher pitched, words are shorter and clipped (this is a giveaway that I'm about to hear from Jekyll). He asks if he told me about busting some drug dealer with a fake Rx? Yes, he had told me ...a few times. I listen to the story again. The alien spew starts....the name calling on what a lousy piece of crap this scumbag is and he deserves to rot in jail, then anger towards anyone else who looked at him wrong the previous day spews forth. He then reminds me how I had that *racist expletive* who gave me a hard time a few weeks back...doesn't that just make me mad? I do "more of the same" and tell him I try not to let people who mistreat me get too deep under my skin. I try to forgive and move on. H abruptly ends convo...I happily hang up.

At times like these the line between the WAS and the LBS are really blurred. I can't stand his anger. I don't want it in my life. It's unreasonable...cold...mean. I can't identify with it because my life is so absurdly blessed I have nothing I can complain about. Little 10 yr. old AIDS orphans in Africa who are raising 3 other siblings the best they can have much more cause to complain.

It's completely like there are 2 distinct H's. I miss the *normal* one. The other one makes me want to turn and run and never look back. If I knew Jekyll would win out I would already file...without a doubt. It's that extreme. Because Jekyll gets mad when I don't join him in his Mighty Hatred of the World and All Things In It.

And he comes over today. Lovely.

I'll try to keep my 'tude in check.