Hi, I find the saga of your XH and the rat enthralling! It gives me someting to aspire to. Whenever I think my h is appalling I come over here. Your Xh could MLC masterclasses, and there is stiff competition, as you know.
I think writing about it puts into a sort of perspective - we see it for teh pitiful behaviour that it really is, and so it loses much of its power to hurt. Then it hardly hurts at all, and finally, not at all [I am not quite there yet].
I agree that your XH seem obsessed with you. Apparently my h's OW is obsessed with me, and I never even give her head space any more. I do feel sorry for her son, because I think she and my h are really messing him up with their on-off relationship, and appalling example. Perhaps he willgrow up resolving NEVER to be like that.
