I guess as I watch from a loving distance I see the connection my STBXW and OM have. They are both hiding behind masks of unresolved issues. Of course, that could be me adding significance to something that isn't there.
She tells me, what little I see of her, which is by my choice, that they aren't getting too serious yet. One thing I did discover indirectly that, in a morbid way makes me laugh, is that this OM who is 23 (my STBXW is 32), has no sex drive. I even found the little blue pills on the counter. Now you need to understand she is a very sexual person, for this to happen, she must have found something worth keeping him around for. I fear this will be a symptom of future concern after the glow wears off.
Its only been 6 weeks since they got together, but she doesn't seem to care about him the way I thought she would by now. Funny though, she still seems reserved around me, like she can't say the wrong thing or be herself around me for guilt or fear or something, I suppose.
As I let go more and more, I see the further I came along by dealing with my emotions head-on, while she seems to justify herself by either hiding or covering them up with OM. Either way, I see myself as the more victorious person in this whole thing as far as stability goes.
Do I wish she would wake from this madness? Absolutely. I just get a bad feeling about all this for her, but I know she will find that out on her own.
