He's on Match.com

[Trixi]

But, like my W, he probably feels that it's within the rules of separation.

Yup- I am absolutely 100% sure that is what he thinks.

I have to say, btw, I've seen pics of you and you don't look out of shape to me. you are beautiful and look fit. so maybe you are being more insecure about things than you should be.

Thanks Morgan Well, clothes were invented for a reason- and I lots of room for improvement if I'm naked. Not enough to warrant tossing me out, though.

honestly, I wonder if this is about you being out of shape at all. I think you are just beating yourself up because your H is being an ass and that is hard to accept. same with you crying about the apt...you weren't sad because that is where he is living, are you?

Initially, yes, that was a part of it. I felt like I had forced my H who has worked very hard to get where he is, to have to be in an apartment that is worse than the one I met him in nearly 13 years ago.

or is it more because he's choosing a dump over trying to fix your relationship?

Then I felt bad because he was choosing the dump.

I just got a call from the listing agent of the house I might want to lease option to buy-- the price the sellers came up with is exactly the price I had in mind, with exactly what I thought should be credited towards down payment. The payment is what I would be paying when I purchase (so I can get used to it) and the credit towards the down is decent. And it appears they aren't going to require a lease option payment up front of several thousand dollars. Which is more good news.

But I am still left wondering if I am *supposed* to do this...