agent99, you don't have to go to a gym to get fit. think of things you love to do...you are taking dance classes with H right now. what about expanding that and taking some fun classes on your own? tap or jazz or belly dancing or any of those. you are pretty outdoorsy, aren't you? join a cycling/kayaking/walking group, or just get out there on your own, commit to doing it. try rollerblading if you haven't...so much fun, and really good for your legs/butt
I personally love the gym and go regularly. but I like other things to, and shaking it up is a good thing.
I have to say, btw, I've seen pics of you and you don't look out of shape to me. you are beautiful and look fit. so maybe you are being more insecure about things than you should be.
trust me, I am not happy with myelf. I'm heavier by about 15 pounds than I was in college/high school, and my body post-kids will never, ever be what it is in its pre-kids days. part of that is the result of pregnancy, part of that is the result of the fact that I'm 40 now, not 20. still, I'm way more critical about my body than most other people are.
honestly, I wonder if this is about you being out of shape at all. I think you are just beating yourself up because your H is being an ass and that is hard to accept. same with you crying about the apt...you weren't sad because that is where he is living, are you? or is it more because he's choosing a dump over trying to fix your relationship?
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
