Andy, D3 wasn't potty trained until she was just about 3. We didn't think she would make it to preschool (have to be trained), but didn't push it. We were just going to pay for her spot til she was ready. No need to rush is my opinion.
I think its the WAS's normal reaction to be suspicious of us, to think we are going to do all these bad things (cheat like them, take the kids, hide money). I have heard all of those things from H. I never even thought those things, and couldn't believe it when he told me he was very worried those things were going to happen.
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but since then there have been incidents where she's displayed such paranoia and suspicion of me and my motives (as if I am the one who's acting strange and untrustworthy).