muddled and angry: Puddle's third thread

[S.T. _I Made It!]

hey. just stoppin by for a bit. I've hurt my back recently so I'm not in a great position to type much.

If your H said he would say it was his choice, I would have left it at that. but you did say that you agree it's best now.

My whole thing with him making it sound like a "cool" idea, is that you do NOT want your kids to think this is the norm. well, unless your not a christian, or your someone who thinks that getting D is okay if your not "in love" anymore. I'm sensing that you are not that type of person. So I do not think this should be a fun conversation. It should definitely be serious like Heim said (I think it was Heim).

If it was me, I would of course be telling them that it had nothing to do with them, and your love will never change for them. I would also be very vague about why this deicision has been made. That you have both tried to make things work but this seems to be the only solution right now. Of course they'll ask why, but maybe even saying your confused too.

This really sucks because I would end up telling my older kid that I believed that M is forever, and unfortunately H was struggling with the M and he tried to make it work but doesn't think it can so he can't try anymore. I would have told him that I made a lot of mistakes too, and even though I can change, I can't make him stay, that has to be his decision. We can pray for him and continue to love him like God wants us too. I would also say that this is not what God wants, he wants M to be forever, and someday you might be M, and you need to make sure that your ready for that commitment and that you keep that commitment, just like Jesus did for us.

I know that's all a religious basis, but because of my religion, it plays a lot of how I look at things and how I raise my children.,

I'm sorry your in such a hard place. I just want your children to know that this isn't how it's suppose to be. But that we are all human, and we all make mistakes, and what they can do is learn from your mistakes so it doesn't happen to them.

take care...