Rob - Don't think for a minute that I would take advice from somebody without first knowing a bit about them. So I did read about what you have been through, and all you have done to make things right.
As you all know, I am a recovering snoopaholic. Back in the day when I did snoop, I discovered some very painful things about their last trip together. Also I (relatively recently) discovered some encouraging things as well, but because I kicked the habit, I don't have any updated info, so have all this crap rattling around my brain. Good stuff vs. bad stuff. Ouch.
But you are correct. She is very confused, and frightened. She liked what she saw from me (and us together) yesterday. She is beginning to see that life with me at home is not a train wreck, and we have things in common that she does not have in common with her "soul mate." However, we have not reached the bottom, though.
Still, with everything I know about her last trip, it will be very difficult to see her leave tomorrow. And although I have no evidence in support, I have suspicions that they have extended their business trip by at least one night (as they have done so in the past).
At this point, if she were to do so, it would be sending a clear message that, at this point, she cannot convey
I think my H feels the same way about our bed. He put himself on the couch in June and I stopped asking a LONG time ago. I don't think he'll be ready to come back for a long long time.
You really did well this weekend, Mark. I am so proud of you. Some wouldn't be able to tackle a weekend like that with in laws, especially some that aren't supporting your marriage. And then you have to watch W leave this week?! Oh man, you are strong. Funny how W is suspicious of you, I have been getting that from H lately too. I agree, good AND bad.
Try not to concern yourself about her time away. I think we tend to assume things are much better and more exciting than they really are.
Thanks running. I need to hear stuff like that, because it's true. It's mostly in my mind. Also, there have been a few other things going on that point in my favor....details to come...