In a way, it is about her isn't it? You wouldn't feel this way, wouldn't have that primal anger, if she had held up her end of the bargain. I agree that she doesn't get it but I what she's not getting is that she doesn't DESERVE that kind of service from you any longer. She had your devotion and chose to walk away from it, not realizing (for whatever) reason that she was walking away from everything in the process. I don't get the mindeset but I've seen it in my W as well. The I don't know if I want to be married to you but oh can you help me with this thing. Like they don't understand that you have to treat someone with a little decency and respect before they're going to want to go out of their way to help out.
You XW doesn't seem to understand of fully accept her role in what has happened and so your boundaries seem unjustified, punitive. Classic wanting the cake and eating it to. My opinion, very immature. Not indicative of someone who has a firm grip on reality because the reality is that you can bite the hand that feeds you only so many times before it stops handing out food.
