Sorry, I don't quite get this. Not totally clear on the message to the sister. Did he address any remarks to the girl? Or did he assume anything that happened was totally the doing of the boy?
Actually, the "moral" of the story was that when the sister's date hemmed and hawed about his inability/lack of desire to take responsibility for the sister for the rest of the night, GP's father said to her "Do you see how much he cares for you?". I should note that GP is in sort of "prematurely old man reminiscing about the olden times" mode when he tells me these kind of stories. GP, himself, is one of the best father's I have ever witnessed in action. He and his S12 are so cute together. They remind me of "The Courtship of Eddie's Father". Unfortunately, he has a bit of a tendency towards treating me like one of the boys he raised. For instance, he said "Do you know what I like best about you? Nothing." which I took as the compliment it was meant as but then I made the idiotic error of asking him what he liked least about me and he said "You do have the tendency to put your feet on the furniture."
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
GP said something to me yesterday that I've been thinking about. He said that one of the things that really "sold" him on me was that after our second date I jokingly said that we had to keep dating because we looked so good together. The reason I said this was that we clearly got a lot of attention when out in public together because we are inter-racial and we are 6'5" and 6'2" since I was wearing high heels. Also, we both tend towards being muscular(his 500 push-ups, my Denise Austin routine) and looking kind of "tough" (his Native American heritage, my Slavic heritage).
Anyway, it turns out that the reason why he liked that I said this was really that he likes the fact that I am rather sexually "object oriented" for a woman. Like pretty much every guy over 50 he is semi-obsessed with health issues. So, his reasoning is along the lines of - Mojo likes sex- Mojo likes sex with man with biceps- I like sex with Mojo therefore I must keep biceps- In order to keep biceps, I must continue to exercise- If I continue to exercise at Mojo-pleasing-bicep-level, my overall health will stay excellent- If my overall health stays excellent, I will reach my goal of living to see my S12 turn 50 when I am 90- therefore, dating Mojo is good for my health.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
Interesting, MJ. My H at 46 is health and fitness obsessed and is always hinting around for a biceps/body compliment, which I find just so SHALLOW. How can I increase my object orientation quotient?
My H at 46 is health and fitness obsessed and is always hinting around for a biceps/body compliment, which I find just so SHALLOW. How can I increase my object orientation quotient?
Journey! I'm surprised at you-- Fours are totally into beauty and symmetry. We're the artists of the Enneagram who must be surrounded by aesthetically pleasing colors, shapes, objects, music, food... SHALLOW??!!
Please investigate this judgment of yours and get to the bottom of it. It is in your Four-ish nature to admire biceps!
Does this judgment work both ways? Do you feel "shallow" when you want him to compliment your hair or your clothes, or your body, for that matter? Is it that he doesn't compliment these things, so he doesn't deserve reciprocity?
Hey, Babe -- I agree with you 100%!! No one is EVER going to see my gray hair-- ever!
So I'm just trying to figure out why a Four (whose main value is BEAUTY) feels it's shallow when her H wants his body to be seen as beautiful... is it because he's dangling the goods but won't deliver? (He's being the reverse of a c0cktease... what is that: a c--ttease?)
Lil, Gray is supposed to be the new cool thing, but I will never go there either!
I do have an appreciation for beauty, but it comes in the form of appreciating scenery, color and nature ( I am sooo enjoying the fall these days up here, although mother nature's cycle this yr is a little late). In fact, my daughter, acting very much like a teen ( insert the necessary stomps), recently said to me, " Why do all our summer vacations take place in North America?" She wants to go somewhere different but doesn't care where. So I ended up booking a trip for August in the Swiss Alps...I guess I am caught up in some sort of Sound of Music fantasy. But that's the kind of beauty I love. BTW, my daughter thinks going to Switzerland is so awesome because of the sheer randomness of it all.
