So, I'm trying to be more appreciative of the stress xh is under, as well as allow him to (emotionally) help me more. It dawned on me earlier that I may still be keeping him at arm's length.
I recalled all the times I went way out of my way for him. Not that I minded, but it was a strain, and I just wanted to hear a 'thank you'. So, I've been making sure to thank him for all his help the last couple of days. I've also been making sure to say that I know how much of a stress this has been on him, and that it means a lot to me. I have to keep reminding myself that even though things are very comfortable between us, he certainly isn't obligated to help me.
xh called me between classes to see if I needed to go get some electricity later, since I had mentioned I was low. (Yes, in Arizona, you can actually pre-pay for electric. It shuts off when you run out of money.) I made sure to thank him for his concern, and tell him it meant a lot to me. One of my biggest complaints was that he always seemed more worried about everyone else. Not that I minded he worried about his friends, just everyone always came before me. So, I want to make sure he knows that I really appreciate the consideration.
I forgot...but yesterday xh told me he still hasn't recovered from xow. I find this both surprising and not. It's been over four years, and I can honestly say thinking about her has no affect on me whatsoever anymore. He said he still can't forgive himself. Not sure what to say to that.
I also finally spoke to the insurance lady. The accident has been deemed my fault. The other driver is okay--it sounds like her injuries weren't too severe at all. However, my coverage is about $10K short of the damage done to her luxury car. Ugh...
