Hi FG, WElcome. You do seem to be a quick study, much quicker than I was coming here going on 2 years ago.
Anyway, about the sitch with your farm, and the related question of giving the impression that you are there for him "forever"...These are tough ones IMO.
You can love him and be emotionally "there" for him without staying in the same house, or even keeping a physical space for him. So IMO this is the easier question.
About the farm...first I'm really sorry you are having to face this unexpected and unwanted decision. Especially if you have become attached to the place. OTOH, you have to take care of yourself, and I can certainly see where the location would get lonely. I moved 70 miles away and still don't have a new social and support group yet, so I really do understand.
Anyway...back to you...can you discuss your options with a L? Can you get H to make a financial commitment to you during this separation? IN some states you can sue him for temporary support, without taking the next move toward D. That is a temporizing move, to be sure, but it may buy you some time. Unless of course he doesn't have any money to provide you, in which case, you are back to where you started.
Noone can tell you what to do, but what we can do is remind you that taking care of yourself financially and emotionally is totally expected, and not at all selfish. Of course being in self-absorbed MLC your H says he wants to you wait, and maybe you should wait as long as you possibly can, for your own sake as well. But please don't judge yourself harshly if it comes to a time that you must sell over his objections. You didn't choose this sitch, you are just making the best of it.
In the end all I could really do here was offer support. And I guess the reminder that you don't have to decide anything today, you just have to start gathering information and maintaining your own health and strength.
