Your last message seems to hold a great deal of anger. You're going to have to find a way to let that go. Simply stating that you won't support her in her affair activities is all you need to say when she asks for a ride to the airport.
Don't mention anything to her at this point unless you feel the need to make her aware of the change in your financial control. Legally she has a right to your joint accounts so it's better to just create a new one and move money to it. Like I said before, show compassion, but no trust.
