Plank removed from my eye, too late for WAW? 6

[Nomopo]

Where you downfall or backslides (at least in my opinion) are in some of your responses and approaches to her.

Let me try to expand on this a little. Consider your post today:

Had dinner. Girls went outside. W said something like, "We're alone. We've had a good day Please don't bring up anything about us." Said I had no intention of doing so and thanked her for inviting me for dinner, that it was nice of her especially after our conversations the last two days."

You could have simply smiled and said: "Ok. I understand." I think that would have been so much better. Instead, you had to say "I had no intention of doing so," which is really saying to your W "I've changed. Don't you see that?" MAnd worse, it says "I know you don't see that I have changed or you wouldn't have asked me to be quiet, and now I am going to point it out to you that I have changed and you just don't get it, my dense W. And then I am going to try to be extra pleasant and thank you for inviting me to dinner despite the intense convos we've been having, which I just reminded you of and reinforced in your mind yet again."

I know that's probably overkill BD, but it's like your trying too hard. At least that's the feeling I get. I can feel the tension in your posts. Surely your W does too. Try to relax. You'd like to reconcile with her, but you don't NEED to, so try to relax, back off, give her some space, don't try to craft every single interaction you have with her (every word, every gesture, every intonation, etc.) in order to get her to come back. Just accept that you don't control the outcome, take a deep breath, focus on you and your kids, and wait and see where your W ends up (way?) down the road.

LESS IS MORE right now with your W. Less is more. Ok?

Nomo