What has been important to me is to learn that it doesnt take my wife to make me happy. She adds to my life. She doesn't make it complete. You cannot get happiness from another person or material things. When you get to that point, you will feel a lot less "all over the place". Life must go on for you while he is out doing whatever it is he doing. You cannot control or shape him to fit your needs.
You can do it.
Me:56, W:51 D:26,S:24,S:22 Married:18 Bomb 9/27/06 Separated 11/27/06 Divorced 10/6/08 Leaving it up to God