Of course she does -- would you expect her to want you to be a jerk while giving her space? Who would want that? You have to exhibit some self-control and true growth if you expect to save your R/M, Forrest. She says neither of you have changed, and though I don't know you, your interaction with her didn't seem contain much effort on your part.
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We did not fight it was good communication.
Based on what I read, you did not take the high road in the conversation. Just because you don't fight, it doesn't mean that the communication was good. You were being rude IMHO.
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She really is asking me to be like a friend. She wants to call me she wants me to call her. She just does not want the stress of talking about us even though she brings it up sometimes.
And this is perfectly understandable. She walked away -- why would she want to talk about the R/M with you? Give her your friendship, Forrest -- that's all you can do right now. You're going to have to start over in a way.
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When we do talk she does listen.
I found this statement interesting. What about you? Do YOU listen when you guys talk? Do you empathize with her and validate her feelings? I may be wrong, but somehow I see you a little too rough around the edges to be doing this. However, you're going to have to do it if you want to plant seeds of doubt in her mind. Show her you understand where she is coming from, and that you respect and accept her feelings (even if you don't agree with them).
Take control of you, since that's all you can do. Make sure you're doing 180s and making the changes that are necessary for you. If you do, she will eventually see them and a while after that, she will believe they are genuine -- just make sure you can make them second nature and genuinely long term. If she comes back, don't get comfy and go back to the old FG.
