Now I've done it.... again #4?

[nephartiti]

You ladies almost sound like you are encouraging me...

I am really close to actually doing this. I am soooooo tempted!

I keep asking myself this question "Will this get you closer to your goal of reconciliation?" Not sure. Might cause a fight over there, at least discomfort and ruin their weekend. However, they will ban together to hate me--not good.

Then I ask myself, "Are you sure you want reconciliation?" I'm not really sure anymore. We are doing just fine without him. In fact, we do better with no contact then we do with some contact. S2 stops asking for him. He actually gets upset if he hear's H's voice and says "No no Papa. No Papa". He gets really worked up sometimes When he does see H and H leaves, he is abandoned all over again. He starts acting out for a few days, asks about him constantly, and is just super emotional and insecure. I hate limbo back and forth stuff for me, but I especially hate what S2 goes through. S9 is soooo ecstatic that H is no longer here. D never really bonded with him. I know eventually S2 and D are going to want their father, but I am wondering if I really want him back.

Here's my con list:

1. He lies (not just the A. He has broken S9's toys, sold S9's videos, and destroyed other property of S9, then denied it).
2. He cheats (the A)
3. He steals (S9's videos)
4. He has physically assaulted both S9 and myself
5. He has emotionally abused S9
6. Now he subscribes to Adult Entertainment Websites
7. He has abandoned his children

Pro list:

1. Ummmm........
I used to have a list, but I don't see those things existing anymore. They were replaced by all of the above.

So why don't I just seal the deal? Why don't I just give one last piece of my mind?

Because I am a bigger person than that? I really am not sure that I am. I am really fuming today. I think smoke is actually coming out of my ears.

Seriously, the only thing that is stopping me is that I am not sure if there are any possible legal reprecussions. Can it be considered harrassment? Can I get in serious trouble? I don't want to jeopardize custody with my kids, not that I think H wants them full time, but still.