Ah, okay. Making more sense to me now. ;\) I had gotten a much needier, pushier impression of you...my apologies.

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I should have filed an ethics complaint, but I decided that, in the long run, it would probably do nothing to make me more attractive...


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There's a lot more muck to be raked, but you get the point. We each made a lot of accusations, and instead of backing off before things had gone too far--as had happened in the past--we just kept pouring it on.


While I see where you're coming from, time to end this back-and-forth exchange. Which I'm sure you know. ;\) No need to point out her previous faults or defend yourself against her accusations (except, of course, in the legal sense). Just let her rant and rave.

Of course you're going to look bad in comparison to the New Guy. However, even if you really are better for her...you can't tell her, and she needs to find that out for herself. That may take awhile.

Well, the pillow-throwing may have freaked her out. My xh once threw a shoe, during one of the worst arguments we have ever had. (He said I was 'trapping' him. This was when xow was around...) It wasn't directed at me. He's never hit me, or even come close. But it scared the crap out of me. And that's been almost five years now. I've never seen anything close since, and I do trust him. But it was a terrifying moment--mostly because of the level of his temper.

So...stop reminding her of all the bad things she's done in the past. However true they may be, it's over and done with now. Don't initiate contact. Especially in light of the protective order, it will just reinforce her view of you as the crazy. I know you were on pretty friendly terms, but not at the moment.

Again, leave it to only necessary communications about the kids. Nothing more. No jabs, no 'reminding' her of what she may or may have done. Nothing.

Oh...and I know where you're coming from. My xh and I practically act like we're dating at times. Then, when he pulls back again, it feels very harsh. But, the reality is, we're not. So I shouldn't expect that level of friendliness all the time.

Azhira

my confusion