muddled and angry: Puddle's third thread

[Nomopo]

Better late than never, I think/jope:

Still don't know what "full Homer" means, but I'm certainly letting go. Feels very much like giving up, but I'll keep the focus on me. I'm not expecting anything to "work" anymore, don't even feel like I want it to. Hey, I may get kicked off the boards!

Not sure if it's giving up or truly accepting that there are things out of your control.

And Nomo, I'm impressed that you're still able to do the JC thing with W. Does she know about the woman you're seeing?

JC thing probably over. If we have more sessions, they will be about us "working out details of the changes to the S or a D or designed to help me with my issues in communicating with her (which is something C and I think I could work on and W is willing to attend JC for). W knows I am dating. I've told her at least three times that I am "out there." She does not know any particular details about any dates or people I've been on dates with. She does not know there is one particular one I am seeing regularly.

Do you really think if you stop engaging him now it will be the end of your R period, forever?

I think it would cause serious and possibly irreparable harm to our R down the line. Leaving him alone in his time of need? Sending him to someone else to bounce ideas off of?

Well, if that is how he feels or sees it (or would feel or see it), that is incredibly selfish. In fact, that is the very definition of cake eating.

But it doesn't really matter, because all the time I spend thinking about him and the R is time I'm not spending thinking about me and what I need, and that's not good for me. So it's a chance I'll have to take.

I agree.

You sound like you need a ski trip.

I am so there. You better be, too.

So planning on it. Sounds like a blast. Good times, good times.

So H says he's asking around for a lawyer referral for us both. If we're doing this together, wouldn't a mediator be a good way to go?

Yes. Many Ls are mediators and vice versa.

Have you read Homer yet???

Hugs,
Nomo