The cat didn't get it either and it wants you to know it doesn't eat carrots.
LOL- I'm glad you guys didn't get it because I didn't either so I asked him to clarify. GP and I have really long convos on the topic of relationships all the time but sometimes we don't understand each other because there is a bit of a cultural divide. For instance, even the term "dating" has a different connotation for him than me and I was totally confused by his use of the phrase "she quit on me" which I assumed meant "she left me" but really meant "she stopped doing her part in the relationship". Anyway, what he meant with the mule quote was that he was the mule who really wanted the carrot which was me spending the night so he was motivated to overcome any difficulties (blindness)in pursuit of that goal and therefore I shouldn't concern myself with his problem which was what to do regarding his son.
My relationship with GP is really quite complicated because we are highly compatible on some levels but don't even speak the same language on other levels (he says he can't understand me sometimes because I talk too fast like someone from New York). I'm not "in love" with him but I am quite fond of him and sexually attracted. So, I guess I'm just trying to figure out whether I will like him even better once I gain more understanding and vice versa. I'm not really sure how he feels about me (I think he's confused too) but he did once say that he "more than likes me."
Our relationship on the phone is very much a peer relationship. I think I tend to fall bunny to him in person just because he is so big and he has a very cool and collected manner and he stares at me a lot and asks provocative questions. However, I have discovered that if I respond to his behavior by establishing physical contact then I become less flustered and he becomes less cool - lol . For instance, we're both pretty relaxed watching a video together if I snuggle up and give him a leg to play with. By far the most important thing I have learned about myself since my separation is that what I "really" was missing in my marriage was the whole realm of "positive physical contact" not just sexuality. Sadly, a good part of the problem was simply the fact that my 2bx suffered from severe eczema from birth and therefore was one of the least naturally cuddly/touch-oriented people on the planet. I say "sadly" because I think even if I had been more self-aware about my wider needs for physical affection, I doubt that I would have been able to just rationalize our incompatibility in that realm. I would have had to join a BB called the Cuddle-Starved-Marriage and I would have started checking out Adult-Cuddle-Buddy-Finder.com etc. etc.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
