Just read your post again, and want to add that I am so sorry to hear about your grandmother and dog. I have two dogs and they are such joyful companions. They have helped sustain me through this crisis. It must have been so hard to see your dog sick and have to part.
You are so right about seeing this as a chance for growth. My therapist has helped me see that midlife transitions/crises are either times when we grow or we choose to cling to the old, limiting ways. I'm more in the "transition" phase than a "crisis" at least as "crisis" is often understood. I recently read a great book in which the author used a wonderful metaphor of times like this being like the trapeze artist swinging to the next bar, or clinging to the old bar. First, it helps to embrace "the dead spot," that moment of transition to the next phase. We can see ourselves and our situations more clearly in the dead spot if we are not afraid to look closely. The choice is ours, and growth is often a bumpy ride but it is worth it. Staying on the old bar out of fear or desire for some security may be understandable, but in the long run is no answer. I see real, deep changes in myself after four months of separation and limboland, and I would not go back to the old me either!
