Don't give her the opportunity to tell all her friends tomorrow -"you know, that a-hole CVA didn't even comment on our anniversary yesterday" and all her friends to be like - "Geez, he is an a-hole" - cuz you know it would happen!
savingus,
Could she really say that if she herself has done the same exact thing? It would be very hypocritical of her. I would think having a card and/or comment prepared just in case SHE mentioned it would be okay, but otherwise I would just let sleeping dogs lie.
Hope you're doing well, CVA -- stay focused and looking at what is in your best interest and what will bring you closer to your goals. Keep considering the letter or talk and how to approach it. I think this will be a good step for both you and your W. Don't drag your feet on it for too long -- that's my opinion.
