Well, I could only lurk occasionally on these boards the last few days. Looks like some of us some of us are handling things really well (lwb, Sue, Sara). And some are also seeing some encouraging progress (Yoyo).
Just wish I could report the same.
The weekend went great with the boys. On Saturday, we went to a Harvest Fest at our church and had a great time. Sunday we went to church service, and then, because the weather was so unusually warm, we actually tried to go swimming -- only the water in the pool was freeeeezing cold. S6 and S2 were so funny, shivering in the cold, cold water but insistant on staying in the pool and having a good time. I eventually decided that enough was enough and made us all get in the hot tub to warm back up.
I had my C session Sunday evening. W was insistant that I get C's reaction to the fact I "broke his rule" about not involving the children in their parents adult business. She also wanted C's reaction to my telling our S's that W (in her words) was a liar.
I told C all about what I really said to my S's -- everything, including the part W refuses to get all the information on. He (my C) basically agreed with my notion that hiding the truth of what was going on from our children would one day cause them resentment. As C put it, S6 is not going to care one wit about the fact that he was only 6 years old -- he's only going to want to know why he was being deceived or kept in the dark about events that would have great impact on his life.
When I told C about W's desire to know what his reaction would be, he said that she was more than welcome to schedule her own appointment with him.
I'll write more about this later -- right now I'm very tired. I had a very rough afternoon. I had another parent-teacher meeting today, and W was there too. (Prior to this meeting, earlier today, I got a phone call at my office fom the school's social worker. She was asking me about what might be affecting S6's behavior on Wednesdays and sometimes Thursdays. I had no real answer to that since I am no longer in S6's home during the week.)
Well, at the meeting S6's teacher expressed great satisfaction in his work, but his beahvior was not so good. He is showing more signs of agression and anger at times with other students, which is so unusual for someone who is normally so sweet. The teacher eventually brought out a copy of S6's picture he drew last week, and she intimated that she wants to help our S do well in school, but she needs the cooperation from both of us to keep our personal matters in check.
My W then took this opportunity to chastise me in front of the teacher about how I supposedly told my S that his mother was a liar. She got this teary-eyed look and started going off on her little rant saying again how S6's behavior was learned from my neglect of her. She got to portray herself as the sole victim before my S's teacher. I was deeply upset.
I on the other hand could say nothing in my defense without it further antagonizing W. I just bit my tongue. When the meeting ended I marched right out the front door -- I did not want to talk to W about it.
Later when I called to say goodnight to my S's, the W started asking me what was my impression of what was said. This started a bad R conversation, and I regret it.
