Remembering myself, Part II

[Dom R]

I think Lil may well have hit the nail on the head re your H avoiding sex if he has had problems with the waxing and waning. Obviously there may well be lots more to your situation but this one thing sent up some similarities in my own M

Dom ....you may think you know all about ED but trust me you know NOTHING compared to Lil.

I dont claim to "know all about ED".
I do claim to have more "first hand experience", with how a penis feels and functions (and associated emotions thereof) when attached to your own body, than Lil does.

shmagic, I'm glad that Lil helped you with your situation. That's great. But that doesnt make her always right, or the only one with something worthwhile to say. It's interesting, how I'm the one who posted first, about Karen's H's "waxing and waning" most likely being a problem for him. Yet you somehow take this as "Lil's idea".

You very flippantly said well he should go see a doctor...

There was nothing flippant about it. I made no joke about it, i put no "smiley face" on that comment of mine. I in no way detracted from the seriousness of it. Sure, i made jokes elsewhere in the post, but I didnt do any kidding about that.

Of course it's a very difficult and sensitive issue for a man to deal with. Of course it can be devastating.
My point is that when a responsible adult hits personal problems... they shouldnt curl up in a ball and ignore everyone elses problems. Especially their wives'.
They should do what they can to resolve their own problems, while at the same time meeting their responsibilities to the best of their abilities.

A responsible person does BOTH.
Karen's husband is currently doing very little about EITHER.


Me posting about what Karen's husband "should do", may seem to be contradictory to my other posts, about her not having the power to change her husband. The reason I'm making a big deal about "what he should do", is to help Karen preserve a good perspective on what a positive marriage looks like.

She cant "make" him change. But she can ask him to, and encourage him to.
She has asked him to change some things before, with unfortunately little success.... That being said, I think that continuing to discuss her situation here, can help her figure out different things to ask for, that he could be more willing to do.
Sometimes, there are 10 different ways of asking for something, and 2 of them will be accepted, whereas the other 8 will not be.
Hopefully, the "alternative to dinner" idea, will be one of them that eventually bears fruit.


shmagic, I also hope that you will post more to Karen, with your matching experiences about having to be on top all the time.