It amazes me how much many of you seem to know about the OP and your WAS's relationship with OP. Even though we are Dd, XH has never acknowledged his R to me directly. He denied repeatedly early on in the separation (i.e., 2 years ago), so I just dropped the subject. Mutual friends and colleagues see them together, and of course we all see them together at work (gag). But to my knowledge he hasn't said to S14 "she is my GF" or anything like that. I don't think the three of them do things, just the three of them alone, when S14 is at XH's. His continued secrecy is really bizarre I think. So it amazes me that folks here actually talk to their WAS about the OP, I just can't imagine what that is like.
Sorry for the digression, it has just struck me as I've followed this thread.
