Please continue to share how your efforts at attraction/detachment are going. I feel we are in the same boat. I agree that we must attract them back, but I feel lost sometimes. That is hard to do, I feel, from a distance when she won't see me or talk for more than a few minutes. Mostly we email some basic logistical stuff about our dogs.
Every once in a while I'll give her a brief description of something interesting I've read. I don't go into any heavy analysis of how I feel it applies to my life. I know deep inside that the changes I make are for myself. I know that the marriage may be over (still, she has not said anything about divorce, or even said something like she is pessimistic; she just doesn't say anything about where she is emotionally). I still have hope that letting her know about my efforts at self-improvement are registering. My therapist believes that many WAS do notice these things. What they do with them is impossible to know unless they tell us, but therapist believes they do get noticed. WAW believes I was the one who needed to change. She was right in many respects. So, maybe signaling that I'm really digging deep is my only hope. I still believe WAW and I could be good for each other, but I am getting better at detachment and am prepared to take what I've learned about myself, life, and love into a new relationship if it comes to divorce.
