Jak - If he is in MLC, you will need a huge amount of patience. I'm told by my counselor that MLC's can last a long time. At least it sounds like he's receptive to working it through. Hang in there!
Larry
M 63 W 40 M 4/91 S14/D9 bomb 7/6/07 D filed 8/3/07 final 2/4/08 thread
Hey just checking up on you? Got anything planned for this wkend?? My H is going up to utica to do a job, but he will be stopping off on wed or thursday to salmon fish.. lucky him.
So once again I will be alone for 4 days..
I think im definately going to do something with my gf this wk. have my mom come and watch the kids. That's if I don't get wrapped up into everything else I have to do this coming wk. S4 has his bday party next saturday that I have to go shopping for, he's got a field trip next friday, and bday party next sunday and I have to keep it together with the business all wk.
I need a vaka..alone..
I was up in glens falls last wkend!
Hope your doing ok..
Email me if you want.
xxoo tal
me: 37 H: 44 Married for 18 years this june S7 S3 porn issues, and much more... since 7/06
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
Larry Yes H is MLC and he knows it. I think he is into the aceptance stage since he is starting to reconnect with friends and spending time with the kids. I guess i would be the last. by what iv'e read.
Matilda, I am so confused by h's actions when he acts like he is(says one thing, actions show different)Menopause doesn't help to keep my feelings in check either.
TAL, Don't know if your H will get much out of salmon fishing, the creeks and rivers are so low.
Wish you could have come with him I could have met you in person. Pulaski is crazy with fish heads right now.
Journaling
I do know he loves me I guess even though her is having a hard time with it.
I think if he didn't he wouldn't get so clingy or try to find time to spend with me.
I will keep my mouth shut for a few more months if i have to unless something else happens to see if he finishes coming thru this. If not then i will make the decision from there.
Im'e trying to be a lot more distant and when i am he tries even harder to get me not to be.
Listen to this. We had h's Mom tested for Dementia because she is acting pretty whacked out (to long to explain) Thinks h's dad who is dying of cancer and in a nursing home is faking to get away from her.(just the tip of the iceberg). she scored perfect. No dementia. But Dr. told me she is depressed and not dealing with issues. Didn't even tell him about FIL and acts like everything is just fine. Told me a lot about depression and that it is like she is in crisis and trying to pretend that the issues aren't there or that there is another reason for them.
SOUND LIKE SOMEONE ELSE I KNOW???? I think this crap runs in H's family.
SO for right now i will distance myself and GAL and wait a few more months is i have to.(we'll see what happens).
JAK
You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when, you can only decide how you're going to live now. ~Joan Baez
I would think that admitting that he is in MLC would be a BIG step and, therefore, you have a better chance of fixing things. More patience is required, though!!!!!
Meanwhile, what can you do for JAK? Think of activities that you enjoy and make you happy (rather than think of activities only to distance yourself from your H.) Does that make sense? Matilda
Yes this does make sense, I do do that but, with H wanting to do things together I let it go more by the wayside. It's time to start doing things for me again. Maybe in the process H will see what he might end up missing.
H wanted to go to the movie on Friday. He called me i was in the City with SIL(GALING) and asked when i would be home as he wanted to go. Then wanted to go on an outing up north to alexandria bay on Saturday. Took me to lunch and then took a boat shuttle over to an island to see boldt castle, A romantic place to see. Yesterday i did the GAL and went to an apple fest with my oldest daughter. Was gone until mid afternoon. When I got home H acted quiet(ok) then while watching tv at night he was clingy. When we went to bed he just got in rolled over on his side facing the other way and didn't even bother to give me a kiss. Told him good night twice and he just said goodnite. HE is so all over the place that it is hard to act as if. Menopause might be helping me walk on eggshells too, as i get emotional easily.
I want to be patient but it is running out. I have waited pateintly for months before i even mentioned R talk so i think I have done good Not pressuring him at all, Iv'e just let sh%% happen.
it's just getting old.
JAK
You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when, you can only decide how you're going to live now. ~Joan Baez
Yes I am sorry I couldn't come up to, that would have been great to see you! The kids are so busy this wk.. S4 has apple and pumkin picking this wk and his bday party is this wkend at the Headless Horseman.. so I have cupcakes to make and food to buy. on top of H not being home, Im it! Tomorrow night though I am going out with my gf, just to dinner but out, so it will be nice. My mom is coming to watch the kids so im excited.
Im sorry about your stitch. i hate the moods swings.. they suck big time. You never know how the he$$ they are going to act. Although I am lonely.. long story had a rough time with him leaving this time.. the only good thing about him not being here is I get some space.. but this is a little too much.
You hang in there, and remember your only human, we can only take so much.
(((hugs)))
tal
me: 37 H: 44 Married for 18 years this june S7 S3 porn issues, and much more... since 7/06
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
In what way were you hwving a hard time with h's leaving?
Most of the time I can deal with the Mood thing I just do what ever but I do really think Menopause is haveing something to do with my feeling being all over the place right now. Went out after work last nite and got drunk Had a good time with a friend I went to school with that i have not seen in years. Got home when H did. TO bad for him.
SOunds like you are really busy with the party and everything. Try to get some help if you can. That might ease the tension a bit. HAve fun at dinner with your friend and keep me posted.
JAK
You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when, you can only decide how you're going to live now. ~Joan Baez
Had a good time with a friend I went to school with that i have not seen in years. Got home when H did. TO bad for him.